


Ten Things You Never Knew About Jett Stetson:

by lielabell



Category: Big Time Rush
Genre: 10 Things, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-27
Updated: 2012-04-27
Packaged: 2017-11-04 10:32:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/392875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lielabell/pseuds/lielabell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Does what it says on the tin.  (In which Jett Stetson DOES NOT dye his hair, hates puppies but owns one anyway, is smarter than he looks, gets married, and much, much more.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Things You Never Knew About Jett Stetson:

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for Queenitsy who was rather bored and needed some entertainment.

Ten Things You Never Knew About Jett Stetson:

1\. Jett Stetson is a sucker for Romance-- with a capital "R" and everything-- and is, as a result, the most ridiculous man alive when it comes to Valentine's Day. He always went a little over the top, spending twice what a normal guy would on gifts and booking a table at the best restaurants, but when he starts dating Kendall it gets seriously out of control. For their first Valentine's Day he buys the following: one big, tacky, heart-shaped box of chocolate (that they eat together in bed the next morning, dropping wrappers on the floor like they are still unruly teenagers), a two hundred bottle of top of the line Cuda (that Kendall later gives to James after James begs him for it for over a month, and after James promises on threat of death NEVER to tell Jett), coconut scented body butter (that Jett rubs into Kendall's back during a slow, seductive massage that has Kendall biting his lips to keep from moaning), edible body paint (that he takes great delight in licking off Kendall's thighs, during which Kendall doesn't bother to stifle his moans _at all_ ), and a perfect red rose (that he later presses and saves in the scrapbook he's devoted to all things Kendall, because Jett is Romantic, with a capital "R" and everything). 

2\. Jett Stetson hates puppies. Hates them. They are high maintenance and Jett is the only thing allowed to be high maintenance in his world. He explains this, firmly and clearly, to Kendall when they first move in together. He even goes so far as typing out all the reasons why the two of them owning a puppy will never happen, which he titles "Jett Stetson's List Of Very Valid Reasons For Not Wanting A Puppy" and consists of the following: Because they are loud, because they pee on everything, because they shed, because they eat shoes, because they hog the bed, because they demand attention, because they have bad breath, and because they insist on licking you. Kendall looks grave and nods a lot during Jett's recital of said list, then completely ignores him and goes out and buys one the very next day. They keep it because, despite all bullet points on Jett Stetson's List Of Very Valid Reasons For Not Wanting A Puppy, Kendall wants one. And Jett Stetson can't deny Kendall anything. 

3\. Jett Stetson does not dye his hair, no matter what Kendall might say on the subject. He NEVER dyes his hair at all. Not once. And he never will. Because Jett Stetson was born with the best hair in the history of the world and it would be a crime against humanity to mess with what nature has seen fit to bless him with. Any "proof" of said dying of hair is false evidence planted by his enemies. ("But why would your enemies hide empty bottles of hair dye at the bottom of our recycling bin?" Kendall asks, his voice both amused and frustrated. "My enemies are masterminds of criminal conduct," Jett replies airily. "Who knows why they do anything.")

4\. Jett Stetson is ~~notso~~ secretly obsessed with James Bond. To the point where he has a small closet devoted to all things 007. The reason it is only a small closest and not, say, what is currently the second largest guest room (but should really be a James Bond themed showroom, in Jett's humble opinion) is because Kendall is insanely jealous of James Bond. Or, at least, jealous of all living actors who have played James Bond. It's very petty and ridiculous of him to be jealous of a fictional character, Jett feels, but there you have it. 

5\. Jett Stetson fell in love for the first time when he was six years old. Her name was Linda Thomas and she had bright blue eyes, crooked front teeth, and big, boisterous laugh that never failed to make Jett smile. Linda did not like Jett, she said that his name was weird, that he looked funny, and that he smelled like moldy socks, which he _did not_. It was crushing blow to his ego. But he was six and he got over it. He did not, once he became famous, have his people hunt her down and send her an autographed copy of the Pop Tiger magazine with him on the cover. He doesn't know how that happened at all. 

6\. Jett Stetson loves to cuddle. There's no shame in it either. Who doesn't love to cuddle? Emotional cripples, that's who. And anyone who says anything different is a lying liar who lies. PS: Kendall is so totally a lying liar who lies, because Kendall loves to cuddle even more than Jett does and will often spend the whole of a Sunday morning snuggled up in Jett's arms, watching reruns of terrible hockey games on their DVR without a hint of protest and then turn around and mock Jett's cuddle-bug tendencies in front of those three idiots he calls his best friends. Like Jett said, Kendall is a _lying liar who lies_.

7\. Jett Stetson doesn't eat meat. He use to, and it was delicious, but then he read this book about what they do to those poor animals and... well... he doesn't eat meat any more. And he'll only eat animal by products that were obtained in a planet friendly, cruelty free way. He's not going to crusade about it or anything, but he's not going to contribute to the suffering of animals either. Or allow anyone to do so in his house. Because that's just not nice. (Kendall mutters about this incessantly, but never, ever breaks Jett's no meat rules.)

8\. Jett Stetson adores Katie with every ounce of his being. He thinks she is the best person in the world, next to Kendall, and spends as much free time as possible with her. She's just so smart and talented and amazing. Talking to her expands his mind in ways hippies only wished drugs could. She always gives him wonderful advice, no matter what the subject may be, and is single-handedly responsible for doubling his net worth after a few comments on what stock he should be investing in. Jett hires her to be his manager as soon as he's legally able to do so. His career skyrockets as a result. 

9\. Jett Stetson is actually freakily good at math and science. In fact, if the whole acting thing hadn't panned out, he was planning on becoming an engineer. Jett never would have shared this tidbit with anyone, except Kendall sort of sussed it out the first time he came back to Jett's for the night and saw the books Jett kept on his bedside table. Kendall told Carlos, _of course_ , and Carlos told James, _of course_ , and James told Logan, _of course_ , who hunted Jett down and demanded to know why Jett was reading a college level text on differential equations. To which Jett replied that he was reading a college level text because he was taking a college level course and what business was it of Logan's anyway? Logan sort of just blinked at him a bit, then launched into a discussion on mathematical theories and from there a beautiful friendship was born. (Kendall was insufferably jealous of said friendship for nearly a year before Katie snapped at him to pull his head out of his ass, which Kendall grudgingly did, though he was slightly sulky, years later, when Logan ended up on Jett's side of the wedding, fulfilling the roll of Jett's Best Man.) 

10\. Jett Stetson wanted to have the Biggest, Gayest Wedding Ever(TM) with thousands of guests and a portrait of himself and Kendall made out of flower petals. He wanted it _so bad_. Because he was only getting married once, damn it. And not only was he getting married, he was getting married to _Kendall Knight_. The same Kendall Knight who blew him off over and over again, who dated girl after stupid girl, and then (after he came out) boy after stupid boy, while willfully ignoring the fact that Jett was _right there_ and totally _pining_ for him for nearly five years. That Kendall Knight, who had gotten down on one knee in the middle of the red carpet at the premiere of one of Jett's movies, and asked Jett to marry him in front of God and his fans, live on National TV. So, hell yes, he wanted to have the Biggest, Gayest Wedding Ever(TM). Unfortunately, Kendall did not. So, instead, they exchanged their vows on a private beach at sunset in front of a crowd of the twenty most important people in their lives. And, you know what, Jett Stetson doesn't have a single regret about that fact at all.


End file.
